A friend once told me, not long ago, that he doesn’t believe in luck or coincidences. He firmly believes that what we do in life takes us where we need to be. As simple as that. Two weeks ago, I received an email from a person in my university, who has supported my company since we launched, with an opportunity to go to South Africa. The commitment was to attend a global angel investor conference in Durban, South Africa and pitch my company in what was said to be a four minute pitch with no guaranteed Q/A. For those familiar with the entrepreneurship space, this is quite a challenge. For those who don't, essentially you have that much time to convince people, that may not have the background to understand your market, that what you are doing is real and promising.
The representative of the conference I spoke with told me to think about it since it was a quick turnaround and a long trip ahead. I worked on my slides for two days straight not knowing whether I was going to go, but I was working on it. Next morning, four days before the trip, I received a confirmation call and I needed to book the flight right away. My team had been involved since the beginning and they showed their support but also trusted me to take on this challenge. So I booked it. I drove to my mom’s job, told her the news, and went to keep working on the pitch.
The day came and it was raining, I thought the flight could get cancelled but to my surprise, there were zero delays. I first had a one hour flight from Miami to Atlanta, then a quick layover. After this, I had my longest flight which was fifteen hours to Johannesburg. I had middle seat, I was nervous about my pitch, and was tired from all the previous days leading up to this unexpected trip. I needed rest. Then this loud guy sat next to me. He wouldn’t stop moving, speaking in a language I’ve never heard in my life with his friends in the back, and fidgeting around. I immediately thought to myself that I wasn’t going to be able to rest. To my surprise, it was the best stranger I’ve ever sat down next to. We talked about movies, farming, physics, family issues, water sports, relationships, insecurities, business, elders, and upcoming trips. He ended up gifting me a bracelet with the word breath in Morse code to help me while I was giving the pitch. He used it to remind himself to breath when his ADHD kicked in and he decided to give it to me. He also recommended one of the best beers I’ve ever tried my life.
I thought the conference would start the day after my arrival, as I was told. But it didn’t, so I took advantage of it and put on my tourist hat. I truly showed it because everyone in the street could tell I wasn’t from there and approached me, aggressively at certain times, to try to get something from me. At first it felt good to receive the attention and even gave me a confidence boost, but then it became overwhelming and I had this feeling of harrasment. I felt unsafe. I didn’t know anybody and decided to stay in. I decided to book an excursion so I wouldn’t be in that area for the day.
I felt like a queen in that day. I had a tour guide to myself who drove me around and taught me things. It was a lovely day. I realized I had a lot of misconceptions about South Africa, I also learned some of its history from the movement Mandela took part of. This hit me on a deep level. I kept reflecting upon how much all of us complain and whine about when something that doesn’t turn out the way we want it to. Seeing his portraits and reading his words, after being unfairly imprisoned for twenty-seven years of his life where he wasn’t even allowed to see his loved ones or have a decent cell, filled me with so much resilience that has had a long lasting impact on me. The last experience of this lovely day was that the tour guide kept getting lost. We wasted 3 hours because he had no cell service and he was also avoiding to go the fastest/safest route because it had tolls he didn’t want to pay for. I kept falling asleep as I was jet lag so I didn’t mind at the beginning. I was also not aware of the situation. On the way back though, when it got dark, and I realized we were driving in circles for forty minutes using unsafe back roads, I confronted him. He asked me for money to pay for the tolls. I ended up paying for the toll and instructed him to get me to the hotel as soon as possible. His boss was calling and he wasn’t picking up, so I was wide awake looking for any signs. I sensed fear from him and eventually told me he would pay me back and asked not to complain to the company. I had payed a lot of money for this and there I was sitting in the co-pilot seat afraid, alone, and without signal. So I remained silent talking to God to help me through the situation. I ended up telling him it wasn’t about the money. I don’t even remember what I said but I said it calmly. When we arrived to the hotel, about two hours later, I told him I wouldn’t tell his boss and that he had to take responsibility so it wouldn’t happen again. He seemed grateful and I just let go. I stayed in the hotel a full day after that because I had had enough and needed to focus on me and my pitch.
The conference came. It was weird to be in a room full of people who held important titles. I was also shocked to learn that the president of Colombia had been invited and he had sent his a letter excusing himself from not being able to attend but at the same time supporting the mission of the conference. I was surrounded by ministers of African governments, world ambassadors, and even royal members of countries I’ve never heard of. I kept asking myself why I was there. All of the sudden I had this feeling that I was there because I was supposed to be there. Even if I didn’t know the reason itself. I didn’t have to, but this feeling was enough of a reason to make it worth it. I started approaching people to talk to. I engaged more and started feeling a part of the conference as opposed to a random casualty or more so, “the company that sneaked in”. It did feel like it at the beginning, I was given a badge that had someone’s else name on it and my exhibition booth had the name of another company. I had to explain the story over and over again on how I was the replacement of a company that was initially selected to go.
We had a mentor session where assigned people gave feedback on the pitch for the next day. Everyone was either with more companies or just with a mentor but I had two mentors. Someone else from the conference had come along and asked if it was ok for him to give me feedback as well. I remember reciting the pitch as if it was it. Both stood quiet for a moment. They said good job. Then it went downhill. They first told me the pitch was three minutes and not four. Then, they started asking ALL these questions. I responded to what it seemed confidently and right. But I felt attacked. We spent half an hour going back and forth about what was ugly, what wouldn’t work, why we wouldn’t be successful. All I kept wanting was feedback on my pitch. However, it was clearly beyond that. We all reached a point where we knew we were talking about two different things. One of them laid it out clear to differentiate where his perspective was coming from. I replied that I understood and asked if he could guide me on what the pitch itself needed to have to showcase that approach he was referring to with all these concerns that were raised during the discussion. I started calming down and we started over. By the end of the talk, we had worked through the changes and I also recognized I had to spend some time thinking on what was discussed for the future of the company.
I went home after all the events of the day. I took some of their feedback and cut some things from my four minute pitch. I practiced, practiced, and practiced more. I cried, I was frustrated, and then practiced more. Then I went to bed thinking that I had prepared a lot for this and I was going to make the best out of the experience by enjoying everything that was happening. So I got there. My pitch was supposed to be at 10:42 am. I practiced three times earlier that morning, did my hair, dressed up, did my make up, had my whole self confidence talk in front of the mirror, took a motivation selfie, and most importantly I spoke with God. People started pitching their companies and I could tell their time was precious and they weren’t taking advantage of it. They were nervous, they were unprepared, they had many logistics issues, and they failed at delivering their messaging. I also saw them responding negatively towards the time pressure and the looks of the judges. I found out that four of the judges happened to be people I'd had plenty of interactions with before. Two of them were the mentors from the day before, one I had grabbed breakfast with and had also given me a lot of feedback prior to the pitch about my company in general, and the last one was so casual we only spoke about soccer and traveling. When my turn came, I jokingly said: "Let’s talk about gray hair" (which I assume was more awkward than funny because there was silence), and I counted myself down from three or four. My three minutes went by fast and it felt as if it hadn’t been me delivering it. I felt like I blacked out. I remember making eye contact with some of these judges to ground me and looking briefly at the bracelet when I was pacing. I was happy I had done it without hesitation and I believe it also came off as that. It felt as though I had gained this confidence that I cannot describe overnight. It hadn’t even been over and people were already congratulating me on my performance. Little did they know that I had come with all these thoughts and there I was with an overnight shifted perspective. I now belive that it just didn’t happen overnight. I met people, I learned things, I listened to others and most importantly to myself. I lived experiences and worked on things outside of my comfort zone that allowed to be there, at that time, and with that attitude.
It got better. It was announced, seven hours later, that I would placed top five of the competition. This means access to investment from the global fund that hosts the conference. It also means the beginning of a new process that will push me and my team beyond what this trip has done so far. My team kept telling me to enjoy it because it would be a good trip nonetheless. They told me to not worry about the outcome and not to focus on that. But as I grew each day from these experiences, I knew deep down that I was working beyond enjoying this trip. I was working on me. While I did listened to them and enjoyed the process, the late night practices, the networking, and ultimately a well deserved a safari trip and a fancy meal, I also set a goal to come back home stronger for me and my team. And I also surprised myself, as I placed better than predicted. So if you ask me, I agree with my friend. I didn’t get lucky. It wasn’t a coincidence that a company finished fundraising and they no longer needed to go to that conference. I didn’t just get an email, took three random flights, or pitched for three minutes. This started way back, and each part had its own significant part of the process.
These life experiences could not have been possible without:
God. I firmly believe he had this in his plans for me. While is hard to explain, I have seen his work and it surprises him the more I surround myself with his word.
My team for trusting me to take on this journey and has always supported me.
The guy from the plane who was a cheerful giver. His act of kindness is one of the purest forms of affection and this stranger went out of his way to gift me something that was special to him. It also reminded me of the people we should strive to be on a daily basis.
The two ladies at the bar who welcomed me to their city because their encouraging words wrapped me up with love. The fact that they didn't know me but were able to speak so highly of me already spoke to my inner insecurities.
The tour guide for putting me in a position of vulnerability to grow in character. For making me exercise my forgiving skills and allowing me to take control of my words and actions.
The mentors from the pitch workshop session for putting me in an uncomfortable position to grow as a leader. For supporting me while on stage to overcome the pressure and most importantly for allowing me to exercise my listening skills to learn and shift my perspective on my business.
The locals who gifted me corn flour, cooked for me, taught me their culture, and showed me their resilience and talents. These interactions with them allowed me to feel at home when I was physically away. Because of experiences like these, I believe that home is wherever you are that makes you grow.
The fellow founders I befriended who took me to the safari and treated me to a delicious dinner and beach day. I could write a whole other journal on how much this last day meant to me. The fruitful conversations, the intersectionality between two cultures, and the laughs are something bigger that I am still processing. All I hope is that there's more to come from these learnings.
-By Thalya Ram.